I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that even a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser (which can pretty much handle anything) would not have made a dent in this situation.
I think someone tried to give the old medicine cabinet a white paint facelift. That person was not, however, a project completer.
So, basically, everything had to go in this bathroom: the pink bathtub, the pink commode, the pink linoleum, the pink wall tiles, the half-painted medicine cabinet, the Hollywood lights that had left burn marks on the ceiling, and yes, even the knee-height brown vanity.
After replacing rotten sub-floor and soggy insulation, adding new tile backer board, and covering the slightly charred popcorn ceilings with new 3/4" sheetrock, it was time to bring in a new white tub.
For the rest of the space: I ordered a new (tall!) (real wood and marble!) vanity on sale from homedepot.com. It was listed as gray but showed up more of an army green color; we love it though. For the floors, I told our contractor we wanted black and white hex tile; I didn't care whether it was the snowflake pattern, the flower pattern, or the regular pattern, so I just told him to pick up whatever he could find at the best price. For the walls, we went with old-school tongue and groove beadboard, painted white. I ordered a sleek light fixture for the vanity and modern faucets to round out some of our vintage-inspired choices, and we went with the same white subway tile with gray grout in the shower. We ordered a new white toilet and installed a new ventilation fan with a light in the ceiling, and we upped the outlet from a single to a double to account for our Sonicaire toothbrushes (which we love).
The sheets of hex tile were apparently a little difficult to work with--the tiles kept falling off--so we ended up with one row of wabi-sabi misplaced tiles sort of in the middle, but we're choosing to view that as a Zen thing. You know, control what you can and all. Plus, you can't see them under the rug (or bath mat), so I'm cool with it. I love the looks of it, but even more so, I love the way the tiles feel underfoot. They're the best. Oh, and we went with gray grout again because I knew it would be a nightmare to keep white grout looking clean on the floor. Design and practicality should be friends, after all.
It's a super difficult room to photograph due to its size and the lighting, so please forgive the poor quality of all of these photos.
The rug looks dark in the picture above, but this is more accurate. Threadbare Persians just look like dirty old rugs to most people, I guess. I think they're amazing. (We have white cotton bath mats to put down on top when needed.)
Zelda approves (I think), but Heidi (as usual) has mixed feelings about all the change.
The faucets for the sink and shower are Kingston Brass's Concord Collection in polished chrome, although we went with the cross handle in the shower; we liked the bank vault vibe. (We also ordered the matching toilet paper holder and towel bars.)
I ordered the polished chrome vanity light fixture from lightinguniverse.com; I thought its lines worked well with the Concord fixtures, and, like I said, we wanted something sleek and modern to update the vintage tile and beadboard.
I have since added three quirky Paris canvases (picked up from Ross for $20 a piece) to the wall above the commode. (Sorry for the messy counters: I'm just keepin' it real. And yes, we really do love our Sonicaire toothbrushes.)
So, one last before and after. Even if our choices aren't really your style, you have to admit: it's much better, right?